Visible Invisibility

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These two photos were taken today, the lighter colored one was taking at 5am, the other one just about an hour ago. Migraines are generally whats called an “Invisible Illness” basically your sick but you don’t exactly look sick. Sometimes however certain symptoms can make your invisible illness very very visible.

What’s going on here is that between 2 am and 5am I was in the bathroom vomiting and for the most part not breathing. Oxygen being cut off means blood is not making its way to your brain MEANING blood vessels start to pop.

This is also the first stage of strangulation, trust me I watch enough Investigation Discovery to know what strangulation looks like.

You can also tell in the lighter picture what my face is doing on the right side, that’s right, drooping like I’ve had a stroke. These are all symptoms and symptoms of symptoms of migraine disease and not every one experiences the same thing. My migraines are worse than anyone else I know with migraine disease, but no where near as bad as so many of the people I’ve spoken to online. This week has been exceptionally bad, 3 full blown migraines only one with nausea (the other two reacted well to the cannabis, this one has not) and lost two and half days of work.

Last night my boss sent me a message about a newly released migraine medication that’s administered once a month through self injection. Before insurance the drug will cost between 7G and 10G a year. That’s starting out at around $600 a month. They say that insurance could bring the item down to anywhere from twenty to five dollars an injection, but that really really depends on your insurance. Mine has gotten worse and now even my imitrex is $130 dollars for 6 nasal sprays; I can’t see myself paying that much for a medicine that only worked once out of the six times I used it. 1 out of 6 is 16.67%, that’s not worth the horrible taste that runs down the back of my throat 2 minutes after spraying in to my nostril and it sure as shit ain’t worth $130 dollars!

*inhales, exhales*

Moving on.

The point I’m trying to make is that there is no such thing as “Invisible Illness” because they all have visual symptoms, even if it’s just that your disease makes you look tired all the time.

I’m very tired right now and I want to go home, but I’ve got two and a half hours left and I’m trying very hard to make it through.

-Jess